people watching

life in this city hasn't failed me in interesting stories. some sad, some hilarious...well, at least to me because i witnessed them.

story one. last week, michele invites me to fuddruckers in chinatown. this is thursday night, i'm on my way home stupid late because i had a workshop in suburban hell, my truck rolling on fumes. i get home at 8:30, turn promptly around and head to the metro. i know that i'm in for an hour ride in, hour out. best case, one drink at rocket bar in chinatown, turn around, come home. at least i'm not staring at my walls. i call her on my way to make sure she's still there. no answer. i get on the train anyway. (can you tell where this one's headed?) an hour later, on H Street in front of the verizon center, i call again.

"hey michele. where are you?"
"home," she nervously replies, "where are you?"
"you suck! you'd better pick me up from ballston in an hour when i get back to arlington," i jest.

she did. she felt really bad about me going and our crossed lines of communication. drunken kickball players you could smell from 30 feet away bragging about all kinds crazy things they wish they'd done. debating the merits of certain acts. at least i got a good laugh out of it.

story two. saturday night. capitol hill with mary pam, wyn, and meredith. sitting at a table at hawk and dove, drinking a pint when some douchebag barback decides he's going to take our table from us. let me repeat that.

he took our table from us. yes, while we were sitting there. drinking. paying.

i'm laughing so hard tears are welling up in my eyes at how clueless this guy is. meredith and mary pam take it upon themselves to go retrieve said table. said douchebag barback and someone actually dumber than him start yelling at mp & meredith. i go from amused to pissed, punch them both in the throat, smash my pint glass on their gasping faces, and leave with the crew. okay, so that's not entirely true, but most of it is...