Friday, December 19, 2008

the brotherhood of justice

'80s movie rewind time. this week, what started as no one responding, regrets or otherwise, turned into four lovelies showing up simultaneously and robert joining us shortly. netflix had already delivered, so i was watching it regardless. i was glad to have company because man, this movie was worse than i thought!

if you've not been blessed to have seen this movie, let me give you the brief synopsis. rich boy keanu reeves leads a band of vigilante other rich kids in their school's quest to get rid of vandals and potheads...presumably because marijuana is the worst drug every cultivated, and it actually causes insanity. kind of like a g-rated version of lean on me, without the bad ass principal with a baseball bat. predictably, they get out of hand, his girlfriend catches wind of it, half the school cheers them, half the school fears them, and there's a gut check.

first off, don't expect an oscar-caliber performance. this is keanu "whoa, my name means rainbow" reeves. his girlfriend is played by lori "i made out with uncle jesse on full house, who also said whoa" loughlin. finally, kiefer "my dad smoked pot in a movie once before i became jack bauer and rid the world of all drugs and terrorism, picking up a nasty heroin habit along the way" sutherland makes a stellar appearance as the dude trying to squirrel in on keanu's girl. it's predictable, '80s after school special in every sense of the genre. the lighting is worse than in most home movies, and the acting is only slightly better.

oh, so at the end of the movie, there was a "based on true events" tagline. oh, really? yup. even made time magazine!
June 10, 1985: Fort Worth, Texas
Several prominent senior-class members were excluded from graduation ceremonies at Paschal High in Fort Worth last week. Earlier that day, seven seniors and one junior from Paschal were indicted on a total of 33 felony and misdemeanor charges in a bizarre vigilante scheme that involved arson, bombings and threatening another student with a gun.

The indicted teenagers, among them honor students, athletes and a cheerleader, belonged to the Legion of Doom, a society supposedly dedicated to purifying the campus of drug users and petty thieves. The Legion may have grown out of the school's efforts to improve discipline. At least four members also belonged to a Paschal organization called the Ambassadors, a now disbanded group of 29 top seniors assigned to patrolling the campus and encouraging others to attend classes. Legion members, mostly wealthy youngsters from prominent families, prowled less well-to-do neighborhoods at night, firing shots at one student's home, exploding a pipe bomb on another's car. A fire bomb tossed at a black student's house failed to hurt anyone only because it fell short and ignited in the front yard. Said a classmate: "These pillars of our community (were) doing worse things than we will ever do in our lives."


invite some friends over, pop some beers, and drink every time someone makes a bill & ted or speed joke as it relates to the movie. if their comment is misplaced, they drink. great fun will be had by all!

4 comments:

Miss Blase said...

I stopped reading at Keanu Reeves.

Mr. J said...

Way to jump to conclusions! If I'd done that, this movie would've been turned off at the opening montage. I think I'll get you a jump to conclusions mat for Christmas, Miss Blase...

Tim said...

Bad office space references aside, I'm still convinced you called me and un-invited me because you wanted all the "lovelies" for yourself....you're never getting "soft v7" beta from me again!

Mr. J said...

Now you're just being ridiculous, Tim. I still haven't sent your "soft V7", so it may as well be a V15 to me...