testing, testing....

One more marking period to go. One gauntlet of stste-mandated testing in the way. This is going to test my patience with test preparation and what I see as something more worthwhile: actually teaching my students something new, instead of spending what may amount to the rest of the year on review.

They aren't particularly excited about it. I guess I ought to try my best to make it exciting, but who among us really wants to listen to their boring teacher reteach stuff we already learned and learned well?! I could get up on my soapbox and rant and rave about it all, but I know it ain't going away. Only way I can reduce or eliminate testing is to invent a better mousetrap. To a bureaucrat, this testing assault proves everything. To an educator, the testing proves that the bureaucrats know nothing. Maybe I ought to become one someday and shake up their view of the world.

Is it Juneteenth yet?

what a week!

Whew. I can't believe it's finally Friday. Thank goodness!

Big changes this week compel me to give a mid-year update on the state of my classroom. No one ever asks, but it does take a pretty sizeable chunk of my waking hours. My class makes me proud every day. They're generally a well-behaved bunch, nary a troublemaker in sight. The worst behavior I deal with on a daily basis is a bit of motormouth and some out of the seat shenanigans. I can handle that. They actually enjoy learning at a time when I sometimes feel like I'm putting the onus of teaching on them. They're using research skills to teach themselves about ancient civilizations. What's more, they're making the critical connections between them that are going to help them remember the information in the long run. I'm not sure how I taught them to do this, but I sure hope I can replicate that year after year.

We got a SMARTboard this week. For you non-educators out there, it's an interactive whiteboard. Think iPhone meets projector and laptop. (Some videos of SMARTboard-equipped classrooms) I've been working on lessons all year long, and my classroom is now blessed with one. The students really enjoy using it. In math especially, it's a heckuva lot easier to use than tens and ones blocks that I'd been using to teach carrying and borrowing (now under the regrouping umbrella). I'd applied for one in the past, but I hadn't used it a whole lot. This year, I made it my mission to use it weekly. It wasn't hard; the school's shared one is right next door to my classroom.

As with anything new, the more I used it, the easier it got. The time I put in now to develop new lessons will pay off in an easier time using it next year, as I'll be able to tweak the lesson instead of reinvent the wheel. By the time the next new, improved, overpriced technology gizmo comes along, maybe I'll be out of the classroom and into policy or government or administration.

Who knows, that may be next week!

teachers' pay

i got this email years ago. i used to think that it was hilarious and sad and pointedly cynical. now, it probably needs adjustment.

Teachers are paid too much!
I'm fed up with teachers and their hefty salaries for only 9 months work! What we need here is a little perspective. If I had my way, I'd pay teachers babysitting wages. In the end, that's all they really are - glorified babysitters. Obviously, kids aren't learning anything from them.

That's right. Instead of paying such outrageous taxes to keep teachers living in style, I'd give them $3.00 an hour. And, I'm only going to pay them for 5 hours, not for all that luxury "planning time." So, that would equate to $15.00 a day. Each parent should pay $15.00 a day for these teachers to babysit their children. Even if you have more than one child, it's still cheaper than private daycare.

Now, how many children do they teach a day - maybe 20? So that's $15.00 x 20 kids = $300.00 a day. But remember, they only work 180 days a year! I'm not about to pay them for all that vacation time! So that's $300 a day x 180 days = $54,000.

To be fair, there are some good teachers out there who have lots of experience, a solid record and a maybe a master's degree. Maybe we could agree to pay them minimum wage. We can round that off to about $6.00 an hour x 5 hours x 20 children. So that's $6.00 x 5 x 20, which comes to $600 a day. $600 x 180 days.

Wait a minute! That's $108,000 -- there's something wrong here!

so, now, let's adjust it to the new minimum wage rates. $6.55/hour x 5 hours = $32.75 per day, per kid. 20 kids is a generously low estimate; in today's classroom and economy, that's likely to go up by 3 kids next year. that's $753.25 per day, per teacher. yearly salary, $135,585. when the minimum wage adjusts in july, the uptick will be a shade north of $150K.

sounds good to me!

why michelle rhee is ill-suited for the job

this isn't the first time i've heard of something like this, but it's certainly one of the most misguided and broadly applied to raise attendance and test scores. what am i talking about? paying kids to do well in school. no, not by their parents, as it were. by a school district. first off, a little background. michelle rhee is the oft-maligned school chancellor for d.c. public schools. since taking office, she's closed schools, fired teachers, reassigned many more. she's a reformer, and the press seems to have a love-hate relationship with her policies and ideas.

so, i see this on the news last night.

D.C. Schools Chancellor Michelle A. Rhee announced plans yesterday to boost dismal achievement at half the city's middle schools by offering students an unusual incentive: cash...Now they are introducing a program that will pay students up to $100 per month for displaying good behavior

the biggest problem i see with this is that it switches motivation to do well from intrinsic to extrinsic. intrinsically, we do things we enjoy without obvious external influences. the best students are intrinsically motivated and actually enjoy learning. granted, the targeted kids don't have much of either, but is giving them an extrinsic reason to learn in their formative years really the best solution?

she reasoned in her press conference that this will prepare them for the work force because school is their job. this is where the parents come in, not the government. school is school, not a job. it prepares you for society and (hopefully) a job later in life. parents are the ones that are supposed to instill the value of education in their kids. sure, i knew kids who got money for good grades in middle school and high school. they did what they had to do to get good grades. did they retain much of what the learned? i doubt it. my parents never even considered such measures, nor did many of my friends'. those friends and i are the ones who still read books for pleasure in adulthood, can carry on intelligent conversations, and take pleasure in being well-informed. i'd venture to guess that many of the intelligent young professionals that populate this great city fit the same mold.

i had a student in florida several years ago that was wholly unmotivated to work hard or participate in school. he bounced between the homes of his oft-jailed father and his never-quite-sober mother and his grandmother. my year with him, he was mostly with his mother, and it was all he could do to make it to school on time with a good night's rest and something to eat for breakfast. he had repeated first grade and was still far below grade level in most subjects. during career month, the students all had to learn about what they wanted to be when they grew up. his lack of motivation in school showed, "why should i pick a job? i'm just going to go to the mailbox once a month just like grandma."

no, it's not easy to motivate kids these days, even with good parenting. that's the point, there's no easy solution to making kids want to learn. great teachers, role models, and parents all fit into the equation. school chancellors that make it rain so the kids behave? not likely.

edumacation

First, a Slate article about education and middle upper class snobbery. My response.

Exactly. Case by case. Case one in my class this year, November birthday. Academically ok, but could do better. Probably on the quieter end of the spectrum to begin with, but cried at the drop of a hat with any wrong answers. Irresponsible to a fault, she never remembered to turn in her homework or school communication with her mother.

Same class, a late August birthday. One of the most mature and responsible students in my class. I'd venture to guess that more than age had something to do with this disparity between these two second graders. Stark contrast in home lives for sure.

The big difference between some parents is not whether they send their kids to school early. It's how the parents view school. Fact is (sadly) some parents only view school as free babysitting and unwittingly convey that to their kids. The kids come to view school as unimportant and don't try as hard or do as well. A little fatalistic perhaps, but each teacher only has each child for one school year, six hours (or so) a day. It's the parents' responsibility to reinforce school's lessons and nurture a love of learning that will ensure their success.

unintended consequences

mainstreaming is the newest and greatest development in special education since, well, defining kids by how different they are. for non-teachers, it's what happens when we decide a student is different, label them as different but fitting into a group, then stick them in a regular education classroom with 20+ other kids who are different and a little bit strange in their own special ways. it works for some kids. my guess is the intention is to teach everyone a little empathy for differences and give that special child some positive role models on how to behave in a "normal" classroom.

my classroom is far from normal, as i'm sure you've gathered. an unintended consequence of the mainstreaming of these special little guys and gals is the teacher spending more of their time dealing with that student's issues than with the other 20+ students thirsting for attention and knowledge and success. unfairly, that one child will stick in the mind of that teacher for years and years, while the sweet, quiet ones that were model students get lodged in the back of the memory bank where they'll remain until they walk in the door 15 years later, "do you remember me, mr. j?"

were you the one that threw your scissors and crayons when you were frustrated? "no." were you the one that kicked and scratched the substitute when i was absent, at training to learn how to deal with you? "no." oh, i've got it, are you the one who ran from me and the administrators into traffic when you had to sit out because you were a little shit in music class one day? "no." well, i'm sorry, then, i don't remember you. the 90% of the students who don't do these outlandish things, the 90% whose parents raised them to have some semblance of respect for adults and a love of learning, the 90% that you want your own children to be, are the exact same students that disappear from memory first.

another unintended consequence is the exact opposite of the positive influence the class is supposed to have on this child. instead of that occurring, and the troubled one becoming a better student and ultimately citizen for it, the reverse occurs. that child becomes a unwitting negative influence on others in the class. he cries when he can't/won't do his work, others notice that teacher gives attention, and he does less work or leaves the room with another teacher to complete the work. "hey, i like attention. i'll do the same thing."

and that is exactly what is going on right now. one student has picked up on the attention given to this special child because of his outbursts, and has decided to emulate them. tears, pulling hair, yelling at me. i'm done with it. it's over. i can't explain to him that the special one is special because he doesn't see that. he's too young to understand what kind of differences they have; all he knows is that his friend gets more attention when he cries and acts out, and it's not the same negative attention he'd get at home from his parents. guidance counselor wants to "talk it out" with him, see if we can get to the root of the issue. i'll tell you right now: child number one, that gets all the attention because of his issues, should not be mainstreamed. his disruptions have ruined a year of learning for all but a few of my students. i love this kid, he's funny and intelligent, i may even have him in my class next year if i get to move to third grade, but the effect he's had on the other 90% of the class wasn't worth it.

appreciation

maybe it's because i'm a man in a mostly female work environment. maybe it's because i'm a cynic. maybe it's because i'm grumpy. this week is teacher appreciation week. i dread this week every year. why?

the appreciation doled out by our parents and administration is made with the best of intentions. i didn't get into teaching for the accolades or six-figure paychecks. lord knows neither one is coming around anytime soon!

the parents that give their all to show their appreciation during these weeks are the parents whose kids will succeed regardless of who's in the classroom. why? because they care. these parents see schools as only part of the equation in raising their children, not the whole kit and caboodle. these parents know that their kids will never make it in this world if they pass off their parenting responsiblities to a different person each year, realizing the constant of their parenting has far more impact. sure, these kids will always remember their favorite teachers, as i do. the ones that extolled the virtue of raising your voice at injustice (mr. deveney), the ones that connected subject matter to real life (mr. beames), the ones that let you slack off senior year (mrs. goldwyn), or the ones that made learning fun (mrs. harris, mrs. lombard, mrs. lay, mrs. stafford).

the administration? well, it'd be nice if it felt like we were on the same team most of the time. problem is, our new era of principals and their ilk are more concerned with test scores and budgets than getting to know the kids or connecting with their staff. dr. hirsch was the best first principal i could've hoped for. she was old school. encouraging, wise, loving. even when i screwed up, i could count on her to help me out. no child left behind administrations don't care as much unless your kids perform well on the Almighty Test. that's what i'd appreciate. guidance. yeah, i'm five years in, but i never feel that way. there's always much to learn, and aside from a workshop off-site, i never feel like i'm getting the resources i need from my own school. shouldn't that be the way to show your appreciation? to further my professional development by learning from your wisdom, rather than telling me what workshop to go to or what test score to strive for?

keep your recipe books and mary kay gift cards. if i can't glean some knowledge from this place, what incentive to i have to stay?

the asylum

the inmates are running the asylum. far from being comical like the movie, it's quite sad. how far is it going to go before we teachers cede control of our schools to the parents, and we all find new jobs?

immigrant song

my midweek mental musings...

living in florida my whole life made me almost blind to the immigrant experience. it was all around me, and perhaps i subconsciously blocked it out. i didn't know of the struggles that they had trying to assimilate. college was no better. i was surrounded by primarily privileged white students, especially in the college of ed. norman hall was a world like no other (perhaps nursing?)--filled with females mostly differentiated by the greek letters on their t-shirts or the color of their hair.

in and around the district, immigration is a hot button issue of late. several counties have closed day laborer centers where people could pick up day laborers in the morning, pay them under the table, and drop them off at night. some counties have mandated that citizenship checks be performed at traffic stops. there's a big uproar from advocacy groups and xenophobes alike. my neighborhood is largely hispanic. most people are very friendly to strangers, a quick smile and a nod hello. i really dig it.

this week, the struggles and worries of undocumented immigrants were brought home in my eyes. we're going on a field trip to the white house in 2 months. for background security, the secret service requested all kinds of information. it never occurred to me that some of this information might cause consternation among some parents. they worry that it will be cross-referenced with INS or homeland security, and their family will be torn apart for a school field trip. it's a touchy subject, as the school actually has no right to ask about citizenship status these days. we don't ask, they don't tell. these parents are among my most caring. they want a better life for their children and see school as the route to that life. they struggle with communicating with the school, culturally shocked into the american belief that education is a team effort. often, their culture dictates that teachers are almost revered. it's very hard to communicate our different expectations and the equal footing that we share in educating their child. whether or not they speak english is a moot point sometimes, as learning english isn't the same as speaking english. once you take away the context of face-to-face interactions, even a simple phone call about homework becomes an exercise in linguistics to make the conversation as comprehensible as possible. it's tricky and exhausting and ultimately satisfying when that rapport is built and the divide is reduced. short of learning a new language a year, i doubt i'll ever excel at it. just enough to be competent and show that i care is all some of these parents need.

that's assault, brotha!

no, not me. at least not today. one of the subs at our school was bitten this morning by one of the special ed kids. this little guy is a biter. he's bitten several staff members this year. today, he drew blood--through a sweatshirt. was he sent home? no. does he know it's wrong? they say he does. he's in a self-contained classroom with few kids and many adults. he's getting as much help as is possible.

i've been assaulted twice in five years. in both cases, the assailants in question need more help than is available in a regular classroom. due to the glory of mainstreaming and my "luck"(?) as a male in the school, they were my charges. first case, i'd figured out that the easiest way to calm him when he melted down was to wrap him up. he got a hand loose and frogged me right in the forearm. i had a knot for two days. i think he was sent home that day, but not suspended. in third grade, he was baker acted twice for being a danger to himself and others. he's been in a mental institution for a few years now. most recent one had an alphabet soup of diagnoses. his meltdown quickly deteriorated into shoe throwing, hitting himself, screaming, and scratching me after i removed him from the room. same week, he stomped on another staff member's foot and had a nuclear meltdown damn near every day. sent home? not a chance.

if i had to venture a guess, these are things that my mother never had to deal with as a young teacher starting out, nor were they tolerated by the administration. the defective policy of mainstreaming in all cases hadn't been dreamed up by policy wonks with no basis in the realities of the classroom. in a real classroom, the teacher spends more time and energy on the needs of those few than the rest of the class. sure, some of the neglected will learn in spite of the teacher. the middle majority suffers, while the teacher frets day and night about how to deal with that child and get back to teaching the rest of the class.

workplace safety is something that i never thought i'd have to worry about. i work with kids for God's sake! how far does it have to go before it starts getting better?

aggravated

i'm beginning to see that there are far worse problems in education than our supposed falling behind in the world market because of low test scores. i don't know if the prevalence of diagnosed problems in kids these days is merely the symptom or actually the problem. my kids this year are ADD to the nth degree. it grows tougher each year to maintain attention while teaching. i can't even take a breath in the middle of a sentence without their impulsive nature taking over and causing them to call out answers, questions, or random stories that have nothing to do with the subject at hand. i teach a classroom full of id with no superego to control it. one of the more problematic should be in an alternative placement. the reason he's not? an inflexible specialist who refused to place kids in said center. "it can be controlled with medication." aren't we then breeding a generation of pharmacologically-dependent children who can't cope with their issues without an rx? that ain't right. it doesn't fix the problem, it merely masks it, and when the dosage needs changing because the kids grow, their education as well as those of their classmates suffers.