amazing photography

A friend of mine from Gainesville is a professional photographer. Ever since she started posting photos online, I anxiously waited for the next installment. This is a multimedia project she worked on that's recently been posted on Vimeo and her company's website, Straw Hat Visuals. Go Gators!

Ok, so I thought I'd be able to embed the video to share. Guess not. The Vimeo link goes to the video. The company link goes to theirs.

rub a dub dub

Two nights of great grub! I've found a new awesome place to eat. Ok, not really found, but I spent a bit more time there this weekend than most people would consider normal. Food's that good. It's called Astor Mediterranean. They have one in Adam's Morgan also that's been open longer. It's a little off the beaten path, but it's pretty easy to get to.

The service is fast and friendly. The food is delicious with large enough portions to satisfy me. Friday night, I was going to go for the lamb kabob. Ravi Kabob makes a pretty mean lamb kabob, and I figure Astor would be the same. When I got to the counter to order, the cashier politely pointed out the ribeye special. I caved. Good choice! Well seasoned, a little overdone for medium, but it was still moist and delicious. It came with two sides, rice and spicy chick peas. Also excellent. I was pretty hungry on Friday, too. My mom was in town, so the three of us split an order of baclava and rice pudding. The baclava is served to share. Very thick, dripping with honey, flaky phyllo dough. Incredible. The rice pudding was rich and creamy with raisins, cinnamons, and coconut shavings garnished.

She and I brought her friends there last night. The cashier recognized me, said hello, and quietly thanked me for bringing such a large group. The girls all ordered something different. Raves were given to the hummous, which for $3.50 is quite a steal! The girls all had leftovers for today. Me? I polished off a deliciously messy Mediterranean chicken pita. Not recommended for a first date as there is no way to eat it neatly. It is delicious though!

Go. Eat. Enjoy. You may just see me there.

big, loud italian dinner

Oh, how I miss them! Way back when the Sopranos were still on the air, back when I lived in my first college apartment (probably the most posh pad I lived in!), we made a weekly tradition of Sunday dinner. Brian bought The Sopranos cookbook and every so often, we'd make a recipe from it. From scratch gravy, chicken cacciatore, lasagna. One thing that was never in short supply was the good friends and flowing beverage. By the time 9:00 rolled around, HBO was a little bit blurry, our belts were a lot bit tighter, and a warm afterglow of a good night permeated the room.

I miss that camaraderie. I suppose that's why I try so hard for '80s movie night to be a success. It was initially, but trying to do it weekly in D.C. is a bit tough. Once a month is more doable for most, though the number of occasions with more than 4 attendees are few and far between.

Flash to tonight. Big, loud, Italian dinner resumes. I actually didn't have enough chairs. First time I've had that many over for dinner. What'd I make? My Pinch-of-this, Pinch-of-that Sauce over homemade gnocchi. Yeah, that's right. I made gnocchi from scratch. To be fair, I had 3 pairs of hand to shape them properly and cook them up right. For what occasion did we undertake this elaborate meal? Mom's in town.

Want the recipe? I learned it from my mom, who learned it from hers, who learned it from hers in turn. One of those, yeah.

Peel the potatoes, boil them. Put them through the potato ricer. Let them cool enough to handle. Knead with some flour. How much? Enough. Add an egg to bind them. Roll the dough out on a floured surface, and cut them into knuckle-sized morsels. Drop them individually into boiling water. They're done when they float. Sauce 'em and serve 'em. Mangia!

Notice how that recipe doesn't really have quantities? Yeah, that's how I learned it, and that's how I remember it. Just like polenta. But that's another day, another meal.

march already?

Where, oh where, did my winter go? This weekend the clocks spring forward. I know the Daylight Savings people are in some sort of plot to conserve energy by making me get up when it's dark out, but doesn't it seem awfully early for that mnemonic? They need to change it to "Change Your Clocks Two Weeks Before Spring". Doesn't have quite the same pop though...

It seems like months ago that I bought my plane tickets for two weddings in March. Realistically, I guess it was. Winter flew by like most football seasons do. I kept busy pretty much all winter long. Between snowboarding treks to Pennsylvania and ice-covered climbing trips to Maryland, my weekends filled up just as quickly as they do when the Ol' Boys of Florida are battling on the gridiron in the fall. It's been nice to have a lull in my schedule last weekend and this one upcoming. Nothing besides meals with my better half's family. It just isn't going to feel liks spring with all the snow still on the ground from this weekend's dump.

Wedding one next weekend will prevent Shamrock Fest shenanigans, but I think I'll have a better time with an old friend from the neighborhood. We haven't kept in touch nearly as well as we'd like over the years during and past college, but there's nothing like one of those old friends you can immediately feel at ease with. One whose mom you call mom because you spent nearly every afternoon there in the summer, perfecting your bank shot combo with a pool cue.

Wedding two will introduce my better half to a large number of my dirty stinkin' frat boy buddies all at once. Included will be the roommates of seven out of the ten years I spent in Gainesville. Good people all, but she's only met the groom and one of the roommates prior. It should be a good time in the sunshine, plus a bonus night with some family to boot.

Which reminds me, I still need to get rental cars and hotels for those weekends. Yeah, about that....

popped collars

Before I was a dirty rotten climber, I was a dirty rotten frat boy. Hard to believe, but it's true. I even lived the house for three years. Three years of waking up on the weekends to fire alarms going off, fireworks exploding the the courtyard, beer bottles in the shower, the smell of stale Natty Light wafting through the air. Don't kid yourself; for all the bluster of fraternities being paragons of virtue, that seedy side is still there. Some houses hide it better than others though. I didn't learn how to be a good person in a fraternity; I already was one. I was just able to more clearly articulate why I was a good person and add some more values to strive for beyond, "A scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent."

In any case, most people nowadays are pretty surprised to hear that I was a frat boy, and even more surprised to find that I don't regret it in the least. Being one made my transition to D.C. that much easier with a good number of great guys to call on to make it seem like home faster. I'm connected with people I went to college with more often from my days in the Shelter than those prior. Climbing brought me a whole different set of friends, with little crossover between sets. When Gainesville said goodbye to me, it was the GRG crew, not the DTD crew that bid me adieu. Granted, most of my closer friends from the house had long since moved on to Atlanta and other towns to start their real lives, while I stayed behind for four more years to see them during football season and at weddings weddings weddings.

presenting his excellency

Pope is a helluva guy. So much so that I dismissed my feelings of hatred towards a Capitol Hill staffer favorite called the Hawk & Dove. The link leads you to the story of my last visit to the old watering hole. Separate the plausible from the implausible based on what you know of my nonviolent nature.

Anyhow, Pope is a fraternity buddy of mine. He is the epitome of an outlier. He is universally beloved by those who know him and a terribly hard fella to keep track of. He's teaching English in China. He's also an incredibly dapper dresser. Granted, he'd been at an interview, but a three-piece suit?

Well played.

Anyhow, Thursday night found me in and out of my element in staccato style. Perfectly comfortable on my way, knowing where I'm going, until a missed microscopic sign dumped me back onto 395 during rush hour. Lovely. Driving around southeast in a new car after dark, not a great idea. Drive with purpose and floor it at the first sign of trouble?

You got it.

Bad feelings about Hawk & Dove subsided upon arrival. Bubs, Pope and I had a great time catching up. The ladies enjoyed themselves. Best news of the evening, interview went well, and D.C. may be his home base for years to come. Good food, good company.

Enough to make a bar seem like home for a few hours. I love when friends visit!

enough

don't know if i'd received this email before, but it's a good one. i wish you enough in the new year.

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport. They had announced the departure. Standing near the security gate, they hugged, and the mother said, 'I love you, and I wish you enough.'

The daughter replied, 'Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom.'

They kissed, and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I was seated. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy, but she welcomed me in by asking, 'Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?'

Yes, I have,' I replied. 'Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?'

'I am old, and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead, and the reality is - her next trip back will be for my funeral,' she said.

'When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, 'I wish you enough.' May I ask what that means?'

She began to smile. 'That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.' She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail, and she smiled even more. 'When we said, 'I wish you enough,' we wanted the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.'

Then, turning toward me, she shared the following as if she were reciting it from memory.


I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.

I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

Then, she began to cry, and walked away.

They say, it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire life to forget them.

the last two

the last two nights have been really interesting. i'll start with recent, and work my way back. last night, i met up with two friends from high school. ok, that's not entirely accurate. i was friends with them in high school. mike and mark were in scouts with me. mark's my age; mike's a few years older. mark and i lost touch shortly after high school; mike wound up dragging me kicking and screaming into greek like. we've kept in touch pretty well over the years; i even got to stand for him when he married his wife. suffice it to say that it's hard maintaining a conversation when you can't all three really participate, more than listening to the stories. that's one of the funny things about meeting up with old friends over the holidays. you always find yourself in a situation where someone is the odd one out. someone is enjoying himself, but simultaneously feeling left out of the "old times" stories when they start talking about people you don't know or don't remember real well.

case in point, the night before we had a mini high school reunion of sorts. yeah, our reunion passed already. a year and a half ago, but that's beside the point. some of the people at the get together had stayed in touch far better than others. for example, living together and going to the same college. that helps. the stories are still funny, you still feel welcome, but left out just the same. it's weird. i guess that's one of the things about not being in a small town for one, but still trying to keep up as if that's the case. were it not for the interwebs connecting and reconnecting people we've lost touch with, i don't know if i'd ever run into any of these people again. is that a good thing, or a bad thing? i'm not sure. what say you?

sunken

sorry to be on a downward spiral today, but i got a bit of bad news today. some of you may know him, some may not. i've got a very close friend named brian. he is a walking warrior, the very embodiment of "the few, the proud, the marines." he and i have known each other since middle school, but it wasn't until high school that we became more than friends, more like brothers. we've walked our different paths in life: mine to college and calm stateside jobs, his to parris island, south carolina and exciting top secret missions. when our paths reconverge as they sometimes do, it's easily apparent that we've been close. it's been a few years now since i've seen him, but that's merely circumstantial.

he spent the better part of three years in japan, jumping out of planes, and diving beneath the waves of the sea of japan. trained austrailian troops way down under. he's been to iraq three times and come home safely each time. he's now in afghanistan, trying to help stabilize the mess its been in for the last 30 years. i got an email today that's made me sick to my stomach and brought this war on terror finally home to my life.

he was on his way back from a mission when an IED destroyed his humvee. he suffered a major concussion and some serious bruises. some others with him weren't as lucky. he'll be fine, and will be returning stateside in february. i rarely ask for them from my friends because he's been safe thus far, and the prayers watching him to date have kept him in one piece. say a prayer for him and his unit tonight, that they make it home safely. i surely appreciate it.

commuting + tomfoolery = carfoolery

the last two weeks, i've been in a funk at work. it's carried over to home, too. i'm just tired all the time. work is a stressful drag, even though i have a wonderful class this year. as was the case my third year teaching, i couldn't ask for a better class. even my troubled-is-as-troubled-does is having a helluva good year. i'm feeling mighty optimistic that his improvement from the beginning of second grade to the end of third will be monumental. it's early yet, but the first set of crossroads have passed.

thursday morning, i figured out one cause of my general malaise. i was pretty much sleepwalking to work in the mornings. i am a social creature and having someone to talk to in the mornings about something besides work wakes me up better than coffee. i had that in florida with my mother hens. they'd ask about this and that, pick my brain about who i was dating, what i did over the weekend, where i was going climbing next. how i miss that normal banter that makes me feel like a human instead of a robot! back to the present, my morning commute this year has restored that interaction to a large degree. the days that i carpool, i am more alert throughout the day. i get to bullshit about life outside of school with a friend before getting to school and talking shop for 10 hours.

small story, laughter is better than caffeine. time to go watch some football. chomp chomp.

puppy love

i often wonder how my kids will turn out. no, not biological kids. none of those in my life yet. there's a few more steps in the path between me and munchkins.

how my students will turn out. my first year teaching i was sure that i was going to stay around alachua long enough to see my first class graduate from high school. different plans were clearly in store for me. i'd even gone so far as to plan to take out an ad in the santa fe high school yearbook for their senior year. maybe i'll still do that. let's see...they'd be in eighth grade now. i think. four more years!

it's funny seeing the kids in my class interact with one another and wonder who will still be friends beyond this year. which friendships will fail, as they often do. which ones will flourish or begin anew, much to the surprise of those around them now. i think about the friends i ran around with in middle school, in high school, in college. they couldn't be more different. as kids change, so do their friends. some of my best friends in childhood were from the neighborhood or scouts. i couldn't tell you the names of many friends from elementary school, excepting the few that wound up at my high school.

what train of thought led me to this wondering state? last night at the gym, two of the kids on the climbing team were goofing off with one another. he clearly had a crush on her; she was completely oblivious to his flirting, likening it to normal friendship. that body language gave him away. his goofy grin when he looked at her; her annoyed sighs when he wouldn't stop bothering her. they'll probably remain friends if they keep climbing. something more, who knows. on the playground today, i saw two of my kids from last year. neighbors and friends, they'd make a cute couple.

in high school, that is. now, that's just too weird to contemplate.

pretty fly

"fly. that's the only way that i can describe those shoes, benjames." thanks, margarita. that's the only way i can describe my exhausting weekend of catching up with climbers old and new. wish the weekend and the climbing wasn't so abbreviated.

pretty fly morning of climbing. warmed up on a nemesis. prettiest 20 foot boulder line in the field. The Heretic. three years in the making, it finally went down. followed soon thereafter by Honzo Blade. and thus began my assault on tiny, tiny holds. i closed out the morning, sending the hardest problem i've ever climbed. The Unforgiven. credit card-thickness crimp near the top. V7. maybe i'll turn into a V8 climber after all. ten months progression between grades. as long as i stay healthy, that is.

following a lunchtime snack, i worked hard the rest of the day. no sends, but good progress made on some wicked cool lines. if the weather's nice next year, i might even get a few more of them. i guess when you shoot for the stars, invariably, you'll miss more often than not. i think in the competitive atmosphere, a little sandbagging is needed to actually get those 10 climbs in before the end of the day. there's no way i can crank at my limit for an entire day. that's alright though. pictures to follow when i get them.

fly friends around, new ones by association. dinner at black cat, good beer afterwards. yelled at by the campground folks for being up too late and having too much fun. next morning brought too much dew and slow moving friends. great southern breakfast, pack up and hit the blacktop.

long drive there and back. more fun on the twisties in the daylight, golden rays of sunlight trickling through the almost-changing fall leaves. hairpin turns aren't quite as hair-raising without fog and deer around each one. handled more adeptly by my new whip, but still far short of the two-seat roadster i secretly wish i could whip around those curves in. better yet, the bike i know i'll never hop on.

norm!

last night was the first time that i felt somewhat at home when i went out in d.c. in case you missed it, the Gators played the hurricanes last night. if yesterday's weather was any indication of how the game would play out, hanna was all bluster and no substance. clear skies by gametime, there was actually a little fall feel by dusk. that calm after the storm that is my favorite thing about big ol' tropical rain makers.

anyhow, when i walked into the bar, i'd made two new gator friends from the metro. lo and behold, i run into an ex-delt. this guy i genuinely thought well of, until he kept doing dumb stuff and got himself kicked out. so, i'm standing there, drinking pitchers with him when jedd shows up. round about the second quarter, the boss and her entourage showed up. i run downstairs to the head, run into another dc delt, and a stranger approaches me. she knows a few of my friends, and we'd actually crashed on the same square of carpet down in chattanooga in december whilst on a climbing trip. lee's accommodations are so lush! by the time the game was over, i felt like i actually knew a few people in this town. granted, most of them were friends from elsewhere, but what else would i expect when i go to watch the game with gator alumni?!

d.c. politics saturation

the funny thing about this city and the surrounding 'burbs is how saturated with politics everything is. everyone has an opinion about this or that and feels the need to share it when a tiny opportunity presents itself. case in point, last night as i shopped for the contents of a care package for an old friend. he's a marine, deployed in afghanistan. it's his fourth tour overseas; the previous three were in iraq.

i asked romona the cashier to keep my two bags of stuff separate, as one was a care package for a marine. we got to talking about his duties and deployments when out of the blue, "well, he's got bush to thank for that!"

silence. crickets. i didn't know how to respond. many of you don't know brian. he's a character to say the least. as long as i've known him, all he wanted to do was serve our country. as i thought more about it, it became clear to me why i'm so conflicted about the war.

do i think we were misled into iraq? more than likely. do i think that guys like brian bemoan their multiple deployments? absolutely not. if it weren't iraq or afghanistan, it'd be some other theater and far more covert. he'd be bored as hell stuck behind a desk, and while special ops guys are an anomaly, it is what he signed up for. he wouldn't still be at it after 11 years if he weren't good at it, and sad as it is, there's plenty of work for him to do. we're in too deep in iraq to cut and run. i don't think there's an easy answer, but i'm glad that there's been more positive news lately. hopefully, we can help straighten things out and our next president gets all the credit.

regrets

one of the hardest parts of visiting gainesville was choosing who i would spend time with and who i would even inform of my visit. the people that feigned sadness at my departure, but haven't heard from since? nope. the people that were excited for my departure because they knew i needed to do it? sure. they were excited not because i was leaving, but because my life would become richer and they knew they'd see me again.

last night, that came true. i met the moms from work at conestoga's for lunch. i ask for healthy, they choose conestoga's. i have a country fried steak and mashed potatoes. not exactly what i had in mind. it was good to see them. they gave me the third degree about my love life. gathered what was left of my gainesville possessions at christie's, got to catch up with leda, and headed to candler's. we hit the rock gym and flouted that new grg edict of no guest passes for non-first-timers. candler, kaleigh, and i had fun crushing plastic. flaco's, sadly, was a disappointment as far as the food went. the company couldn't be beat. thank you to all for showing up. it was great to see you and catch up.

stubbie's and its smokeless brilliance led to sculpturing, the gainesville kissing cousin of buildering. good times, war wounds this morning. to all involved, sincerely, my door is open to you if you want to visit.

surely, next time i visit the 'ville, it'll be for more than 18 hours and maybe i'll open my mouth to more than those of you who were in town.

is this what the world is coming to?

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg has argued that his Web site makes human relationships more "efficient."

Sure, he said in a speech last year, two friends "can communicate offline if one of them picks up the phone to call the other, or if they take some time to hang out, or if they randomly bump into each other. But these methods are all synchronous -- they're kind of inefficient. In order for them to work, both people have to be paying attention to each another at the same time.

"There's a better way to do this; and on Facebook, it's simple. These people can read each other's profiles any time they want to see new information about each other. They can look at each other's media, and they can send each other messages. On Facebook these real connections become more efficient. People get more value out of all their relationships."

facebook is lame. that's the common refrain from many of my friends. that aside, my friends and i certainly use it to plan trips and such. i do keep in touch sporadically with 'villains, though i'm finding that i regularly keep in contact with nowhere near the 200 or so friends i claim on the site. are those people still my friends? sure. just because i don't see them doesn't mean they're not friends. the verbal sparring back and forth with my closer friends is more often accompanied by phone calls or long-distance travel plans. facebook users organized a farewell to boozing on the tube party in london this weekend. egypt squashed a possible uprising by students critical of the government, organized on facebook.

and this is what mark zuckerberg has to say about the site? "improving" friendships? horseshit! taking friendships and figuring out how to market them. brilliant in its entrepreneurial spirit, but completely lame when it comes to people who exclusively communicate with their online friends in this manner.

shamrocks shamrocks everywhere!

[announcer voice]: saturday! march 15th! rfk stadium grounds! fifty bands! ten stages! beer! carnival rides! food! dc101's shamrockfest!

ahem. sorry, don't know what got into me. i spent a beautiful day in the sun yesterday. close to seventy outside. no clouds. music. ok, mostly cover bands where i stood, but still...

best part. i only paid 70 cents for it. whaaaat? here's the math. free ticket (valued at $20). free t-shirt (valued at concert prices of $43. no, not really). two free $5 food vouchers (really? you can't figure that out?). free chicken fingers and pizza and soda to boot (at carnival prices, $13). free beer (three at five bucks a pop). so far, my outlay is exactly zero. metro ride round trip $3.70. spent $7 on a philly cheesesteak with the food vouchers and got $3 cash in change. $3.70 minus $3.00 equals seventy cents spent. how did i get this amazing deal? i sold my soul to hiball events and the james madison university alumni association for four hours of pouring bud light at the beer trucks. tips went to scholarships. music went in my ears. sun went on my head.

after my duty was up, checked out the music after some grub. up-and-coming non-cover band out of richmond. carbon leaf. great stuff. i highly recommend catching them if they hit your town.

people watching was entertaining as usual. she's in spain, and i was hanging out with her friends all day. quote unquote, "you're becoming one of the gang." or something like that. if one of us noticed an interesting character, most of us did and had good laughs. the frat boy in the pink polo shirt. the guy that chugged his beer before he left the truck to get another. the guys that ran through the line like it was a marathon water table. the guys that came back five times an hour and their eventual descent into stupor, though they maintained they were fine. all the kilts. all the green and shamrocks. it was quite entertaining to see. much better than being the sober guy at the bar, that's for sure.

pregnancy

gotcha! i'm not pregnant.

random dream last night. i'm having a party. housewarming or something. lots of people from florida came to visit. a lot of people actually. candler. palmer. clowe. a few exes. a few people i haven't talked to in months or longer. one of the not-forgotten friends was in the dream with his wife, who was pregnant when i left florida. now, in the dream, i apparently didn't know that, and they chose the trip for my party to tell me. i was all excited for them, as i was in real life way back when i found out.

so, i email him this morning when i wake up since i thought it was really strange that he was in my dream. how's life? when's she due? are you a papa yet? he writes back. she had our son. yesterday. at 2am. probably when i was having that dream.

is that weird or what?!

boomeranging

friends, countrymen, lend me your ears. last night i took part in the greatest incarnation of barhopping i've ever been privilege to. no limo, no lines, no cover charges. entrepreneurial opportunity for someone with a few coins?

the ride: a reconfigured school bus. seats torn out, replaced with benches facing inward. three "stability" poles in the middle of the bus.

the host: a gregarious former party girl. she apparently has an equally attractive husband that hosts the other bus when the group's big enough. mingling with the riders on the bus and in the clubs.

the trip: four bars/clubs. changes depending on drink specials and what kind of deal the company has worked out with the destinations. about an hour at each bar. now, it seems to me that this concept works best in a bigger city like d.c. because there are numerous nightlife districts that have both no nearby parking and are too far to walk between. gainesville, hmm. going between the redneck dive bars on the outskirts in a jacked-up short bus with rebel flags? nah, that'd suck!

like clockwork, we hit each watering hole for a power hour. skipped the lines, got frisked, partied like rockstars, and moved on. waivered away, we b'ed our o.b. in between stops. we figured they gross more than three grand a weekend to be a lower cost limo crossed with a d.d. and a club promoter. not a bad gig, and everyone has a blast.

...until they wake up the next morning!

security in relationships

i'm aiming for a little discussion with this post. i want to know what you think of this all-too-common scenario that plays out with opposite sex friends.

as billy crystal's harry burns famously said, "men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way...no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her...the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story." when both agree that something might be there and dating is attempted, sometimes it's amazing and lasts. sometimes it's a disaster, both parties agree, and the friendship remains after a date or a month.

hang on. i'm getting to my point!

after moving on, why do the new beaus have a problem with the resumed friendship? leda thinks (and i agree most of the time) that an ex is the last person that a current should be concerned about. they tried, it didn't work, they think highly of one another, and if it's possible, they have a normal friendship. why the concern for lingering feelings? or the sense that the ex is some sort of threat?

i can easily see the issue with a long relationship. there's a better chance of lingering feelings in that case. although i'd say that in most cases, if the person is dating once more, aren't they gone? i'd define the shorter one as one where the friendship was and is a longer amount of time than they dated. no worries, right? she (or he) is with you now. you win, ex lost.

if you're one that takes issue with such friendships of your beau, why? if not, why not? i'm severely curious about this, as it seems to be such a cause of dating strife. so much so that i wonder if it's not better to just leave out that detail when describing your old friends to a new flame...

(i know people read my scribblings, but rarely do i expect much comment. please do!)